Things That Are Destroying Jane Greene’s Undead Social Life Before It Can Even Begin: 1) A twelve-year-old brother who’s convinced she’s a zombie. 2) Parents who are begging her to turn them into vampires. 3) The pet goldfish she accidentally turns instead. 4) Weird superpowers that let her rip the heads off of every other vampire she meets.(Sounds cool, but it doesn’t win you many friends.) 5) A psychotic vampire creator who’s using her to carry out a plan for world domination.And finally:6) A seriously ripped vampire hunter who either wants to stake her or make out with her. Not sure which. Being an undead, eternally pasty fifteen-year-old isn’t quite the sexy, brooding, angst-fest Jane always imagined.... Helen Keeble’s riotous debut novel combines the humor of Vladimir Tod with Ally Carter’s spot-on teen voice. With a one-of-a-kind vampire mythology and an irresistibly relatable undead heroine, this uproarious page-turner will leave readers bloodthirsty for more.
The AWESOME Guest Post:
“Can I help you?” asked the nice salesperson at the desk. Time congealed around me like cold porridge as I stared helplessly at her, my mind racing through ways that I could prove my identity. My photo isn’t on the book. I could show her my author webpage on my phone, but anyone can fake a webpage. My husband was obviously a biased witness. My two-year-old! She could vouch for me! … except that she would also identify my husband as the author of every other book in B&N, thus somewhat casting doubt on her testimony. I could get my agent on the phone! Except that she was on the other side of the country and probably sound asleep, and who would believe a random person on the phone, anyway? “Hi I’m the author of FANG GIRL and I was wondering if I could sign the copies you have in stock?” I said, all in one breath, and then closed my eyes. They weren’t going to believe me. They were going to think I was a random crazy person who wanted to wantonly deface books. I would be escorted out by security. I would be barred from every B&N across the country. My two-year-old would witness my shame and require countless hours of expensive therapy in her mid-thirties to get over the trauma… “Oh, that’s so exciting! Of course you can! Thank you so much for stopping by!”
1) The front cover of the book says FANG GIRL, by Helen Keeble 2) Helen Keeble is not my legal name (it’s my maiden name, as I was writing before I married) 3) I had absolutely nothing on my person that could identify my as Helen Keeble
Next time, I’m going to claim to be Stephanie Meyers.
About the Author:
Helen Keeble is not, and never has been, a vampire. She has however been a teenager. She grew up partly in America and partly in England, which has left her with an unidentifiable accent and a fondness for peanut butter crackers washed down with a nice cup of tea. She now lives in West Sussex, England, with her husband, daughter, two cats, and a variable number of fish. To the best of her knowledge, none of the fish are undead. Her first novel, a YA vampire comedy called FANG GIRL, is out 11th Sept 2012, from HarperTeen. She also has another YA paranormal comedy novel (provisionally titled NO ANGEL) scheduled for Sept 2013.Find and Follow her on: Facebook / Twitter / Goodreads / Website
This giveaway is open internationally, and the last day to enter is December 25th.
Thanks for stopping by and what do YOU think? INTERESTING? Right!